Nightmares
by AriaAlways
Summary: Oneshot. First in my 'Past' Series. Reno's life has been turned upside down more times than he would care to think about. Still, there has always been one constant, one comfort. No pairings. AU of my personal head canon.


**Hey there everyone! So, the writing bug bit me recently, and this kinda just stuck in my head, and Reno wouldn't quit annoying me to write about him so... here's the result of all that. I've got a couple more of a similar vein to this floating around that'll get up here eventually, too. But enough blabbing from me. Enjoy the fic!**

**Disclaimer: If I owned any of this, Rikku would wear more clothing and Riku wouldn't. XD**

He could still remember that night, still had nightmares about it. When he was younger he had crawled into bed with his brother after those nightmares, but at nineteen he felt much too old to do that anymore. Still, every time the memories of that day came to him in his sleep and woke him up, his stomach raging like a storm and his body quaking all over, he had to look over to his brother's bed, make sure that they had both escaped, that the last seven years of his life hadn't been the dream, and the nightmare the reality. And every time he saw that long, lanky body, the reddish-brown spiky hair, the faced almost a mirror of his own, he sighed with relief and turned back over to sleep.

Reno's nightmares were always of that day they had barely escaped Radiant Garden. Even though several frightening things had happened to him since then, those nightmares never changed. He could still see the faces of the people he had run into. He could still remember running, pulling his half-asleep brother through the streets, twisting and turning, avoiding the shadows. He could still remember the silent blackness they had stumbled into, an ageless space. He could never remember how long they had been in that blackness, but they had somehow ended up in front of a huge tent, the big top of the circus that was now their family.

The show had just begun, and the brothers, tired, hungry, cold in nothing but their pyjama pants, had snuck around the back to see what they could find to 'liberate' from the caravans of the circus performers.

"It's not stealing," Reno's fourteen-year-old brother had insisted when Reno began worrying about the morals of their endeavour. "We are in much greater need than they are. We're gonna freeze if we don't find something better to wear. Who's gonna miss a shirt here, some socks there, huh? We're just borrowing stuff until we can get out own things. We'll give them back."

Reno was convinced. His brother could convince anyone of anything. When they were small, Ael had convinced him that ale was actually named after him, but they had spelled it wrong. Reno still half-believed that.

Needless to say, the two boys had been caught. A small dog under the stairs of the third caravan they were going to enter had jumped out at them. In the half-dark, Reno hadn't seen what it was and screamed bloody murder. Several caravan doors had opened and a dozen people had suddenly grabbed the two of them, snatching the clothes back from Ael's arms and the loaf of bread out of Reno's. They had been locked into an empty caravan to wait until the performance was over, and the ringmaster could deal with them.

Ael had raged and stormed around the cabin for almost an hour, Reno watching him, silent tears slowly running down his cheeks. Once Ael had worked his rage out, he sat down on the small bed next to his younger brother and put his arm around him.

"Well get out of this," he had said. "We'll look after each other. You just saved my life, kid. Don't forget that."

Reno had stayed silent, but nodded. After such an ordeal, it wasn't a surprise that the ringmaster walked in two hours later to find them both asleep. He watched them for a moment. He noticed the tired circles under their eyes, and the scared expressions as the terrors of their last few hours haunted their dreams. He woke them up gently, but still Ael was quickly on his feet, keeping himself between his brother and the ringmaster, shouting and making obscene gestures. The ringmaster, however, had stood there calmly. Once Ael paused for breath, he said "My name is Amoroso, and I am the ringmaster of this circus. Would you boys like to be in the circus? I assume you have nowhere else to go, because only someone desperate steals from a circus."

The brothers had glanced at each other. This was true, they were desperate. But what could they do in a circus? Amoroso had sensed their unease, for he added: "There are all sorts of jobs in a circus: I'm sure we could find something for you to do. Clowns, perhaps?" he finished with a smile, indicating the markings that adorned the boys' faces.

Reno had touched his half-moon marks and felt the tears return to his eyes. All boys in the brothers' family got tattoo markings on their face at age five. It was an old, strange tradition, but still used nonetheless. Often they made Reno proud of the fact that he was a part of his family. Now, they were just reminders of people he may never meet again.

Ael too had touched his own triangular markings sadly, but the moment was brief. He stood tall and faced Amoroso. "I'm Ael, and this is my brother Reno. If you really want us, we'll stay with you." He said.

And that was how they had come to be part of the circus. The boys had started out taking care of various animals that performed in the show. Monkeys, dogs, horses, and, Reno's favourites, elephants. He snuck them food from his own dinner, and soon only he and their owner could feed them, they wouldn't take food from anyone else. Ael, however, after a catastrophe involving fireworks, acrobatics, and two of the monkeys, soon became a fire juggler. He could throw fireworks through hoops up high in the tent with perfect accuracy, and spin up to three lit Catherine wheels on each arm with out the smallest burn. Ael once said that if he wanted he could walk through twenty feet of fire and be perfectly fine. Reno still half-believed that.

Not long afterwards, Reno had been spotted racing the other circus children up a tree, beating all of them by a full half minute. That very day Amoroso had sent him to practice with the acrobats, and soon he was also in the circus performance, climbing nets, ropes, even the tent poles with little more than his hands and feet. Both brothers became main acts, but still helped with the animals.

So for a few years the brothers were happy. They missed their family and their home, but they had made a new family too.

But happy endings aren't the end. Three years later, Amoroso died, and the circus was led by a man called Warrens. Warrens was much stricter than Amoroso had been, and cruel to the animals if he thought they hadn't performed well enough.

And that was how the brothers had lived for the past four years, secretly rebelling against Warrens with pranks and secrets. Most recently, involving a baby elephant. The little thing was the first baby elephant either boy had seen, but Warrens was not pleased, because it's ears were humongous and unseemly. He had cruelly named it Dumbo, a name the brothers raged against with all they could. But it stuck unfortunately. But this wasn't the worst.

The little elephant had been shown in a tent along with the others, and boys from the local town had picked on him, causing Dumbo's mother to go on a rampage to protect her son. Warrens had deemed her unsafe, and locked her away in a cage by herself. Reno and Ael had been outraged, but no amount of yelling, convincing or bribery had made him change his mind. Furious, the brothers had snuck as many comforts and as much food as they could into the cage, and looked after little Dumbo as much as possible. But secretly they were planning.

"This is getting to be too much," Ael had said. "We should take the elephants and run away, start our own circus! Heck, half the people here would come with us."

"I dunno, Ael… we got nowhere to start." Reno had replied.

"Alright, but if you ever wanna get outta here, just tell me and we'll go. Don't forget that."

Reno shut his eyes tight as these memories flooded back over him. It had only been a week since the elephant was locked up, but already he was seriously considering Ael's proposal. _Tomorrow,_ he thought, _we'll start making plans to leave. Those elephants shouldn't suffer like this!_ He open his eyes again, to glance over towards the brother he was about to go on another adventure with. But that wasn't all he saw…

With a cry of alarm and warning, Reno jumped out of bed and grabbed Ael's arm, dragging him out of harm's way just as he had seven years ago. Groggily Ael stumbled to his feet.

"Wassit?" he mumbled. Reno pointed towards the shadows that were twitching and shuddering on Ael's bed. His eyes grew wide.

"Crap, get outta here, Reno!" he shouted, pulling a Catherine wheel from the table and lighting it with a match. He threw it at the creatures, then grabbed the other wheels and pushed Reno out of the caravan.

The circus was chaos. Dark, frightening creatures loomed everywhere. Ael lit another wheel and sent it spinning into a large group on their left. Reno spun around behind his brother and began pushing him towards a gap in the line of shadows. But Ael manoeuvred out of his brother's grip.

"I said get outta here, Reno! These things'll be everywhere in minutes!"

"Well then quit makin' 'em angry! C'mon!"

"No, get goin'! I'll hold 'em off, you run!" Ael shouted over the screams and hisses.

"What! No way, I-"

"Damnit, Reno, I'm two years older, do what I say. I'll find you again, don't forget that! Now run, you brainless wonder!" And with an almighty shove, Ael sent Reno into the escaping crowd. The last Reno saw was of him smacking his enemy upside the head with a Catherine wheel. The sight would have been hilarious if Reno hadn't been worried out of his mind for Ael's safety. Then, there was only that horrible, ageless blackness.

Three years later, Reno sat bolt upright in his bed in Radiant Garden. _Damnit,_ he sighed to himself,_ I thought I was over those nightmares._ He ran a hand through his mess that was sometimes considered hair and turned over to try to sleep again.

But suddenly, he knew he wasn't alone in the room. Freezing for only a split second, he snatched up his Electro-Mag Rod from the bedside table and held it out in front of him.

"Who's there?!" he exclaimed, wildly waving the weapon in front of him. A low chuckle answered from a shadowy corner.

Reno flicked on the lamp beside him – only to stifle a gasp of astonishment. It took him a moment to remember that, no, there wasn't a mirror in that corner, the man standing there really did look almost identical to him. But more than that, he was wearing a floor length black coat. Squall – Leon – whatever the hell he called himself nowadays – had told him about these people in black coats. These Nobodies. Sadistic bastards without hearts, trying to destroy the worlds. This was obviously one of their tricks.

"I know who you are!" Reno shouted, pointing the rod at him. "You're a Nobody. You're here to take my heart. Well, take this!" he roared, lunging at the other man. But suddenly, he wasn't there. Blackness had swallowed him up, and Reno involuntarily shuddered, recalling his own experience with that silent darkness.

A voice began speaking from the other end of the room. Reno whirled around, to see that face so like his own start speaking in his voice.

"You're a smart one, kid. I bet you're so smart you know how a Nobody gets their name, too." There was no expression in the Nobody's voice, unlike Reno's.

"I don't give a frick about your name!" he replied, racing towards the man. But again, he was gone. Reno looked wildly about, waiting for another sound. And it came – from the window?

The Nobody was standing now on the roof below Reno's window, just out of his reach. And the Nobody was speaking in that same flat tone. But his eyes told a different story. Reno knew that Nobody's couldn't feel emotion, but one look into this Nobody's eyes, and Reno had doubts. He swore he saw tears in those eyes.

"A Nobody's name," he was saying, "is their original name… with an X in it."

And then he was swallowed up by the darkness for the last time, leaving Reno, finally, with the knowledge of exactly had happened to his brother.

**There you go! Hope it wasn't too purple in places, I can get a bit like that at times. Also, if you notice a spelling or grammar mistake, please let me know! I can read my own work a hundred times and not pick some up! Anyway, review please!**

**Aria**


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